Secrets
by VeritaParlata
Summary: Mimi sets out to reclaim her dignity and tells Shawn the truth about his daughter.
1. Part 1, Letter:

Secrets:

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the character from _Days of Our Lives_. This story was not written to infringe, but for entertainment.

Part I - Letter:

Miriam 'Mimi' Brady sat at the desk in the apartment she shared with her husband, Shawn. Her fingers drummed lightly against the hard mahogany wood as she twirled the pen in her other hand. There were no sounds in the room, other than the slow song playing on the radio in the kitchen and the soft whoosh of the breeze coming in through the window.

Her eyes scanned the stationary paper in front of her and her mind immediately filled with thought, questions, scenarios and emotions of what was about to play out. She was thankful her husband was out right now. She really didn't need to be distracted right now. And his being there, with that crooked smile and soulful eyes, the way he simply looked at her made her melt; he would have distracted her just by being in the same room.

It was hard to imagine what her life would be like now. She knew she would be hated. His family would hate her for not being honest. For taking away something special that they needed. Friends of his family would scorn her, saying she only intended to get him away from Belle, his one true love. Her friends would hate her for the agony she caused. Her family would hate her for not being able to keep her mouth shut. Shawn would hate her for the lie. That alone, she had promised him she would never do. However, most of all, and in spite of everything, she hated herself. She hated what she was doing, the position she was in and the fact that this would always be between her and the man she loved.

That was the reason she was doing this.

She had two very important things to do today. Two very important things that would dictate how the rest of her life would turn out. No matter what the future held, and she was most certain she would be losing her husband, she would always have this moment. The moment she decided to grow up, to be the woman she has always wanted to be; the moment she found her self-respect. If she could do nothing else after today, she would be able to look at herself in the mirror.

With a deep sigh, she brought the tip of the pen to the paper and began taking her life back.

'_Dear, Shawn…'_

- - -

When she stepped in the house, Shawn wanted nothing more than to kiss his wife. He would hold her in his arms, kiss her and all would be right with the world. It took him by surprise just how quickly he fell in love with his wife. He's loved her all of his life…as a friend. When they married, he knew he could love her as his wife for the rest of his life. However, Belle Black would always be in his heart. She would always be his one true love, his soul mate. In the five months that he and Mimi have been married, he found that not to be true.

Belle was his past. A special girl whom he would always love. He would always be there for Belle, to keep her from ruining her life or her husband and daughter's life by her unending pursuit of him. But that was as far as the extent of his feeling for her went. Shawn wasn't sure when it happened. When Mimi became the center of his universe. He couldn't pinpoint the exact moment that his soul connected to hers on a level that was deeper than any before. He couldn't pinpoint the moment where he knew, without any doubt, that she was the one for him. He was sure that it wasn't even a grand moment. No catalyst had been reached when he came to that conclusion. He was sure it was some trivial moment when the business with his cousin Max was going down the drain and she simply held his hand and listened to him. She would caress his face and tell him that he would figure it out, he always did. She wouldn't coddle him or try to figure it out for him, but she would never let him give up on himself. Thinking about it now, Shawn was certain he fell so deep in love with her when she smiled at him.

"Mimi!" - Shawn called as he stepped into their apartment, the smile on his face brighter than the sun. "Baby, I'm home." - he closed the door behind him and walked further inside. He heard no sounds in the apartment and his brow furrowed. He checked his watch, sure that she would be home from class by now. Walking to their bedroom, "Baby?" - he called to her again.

Nothing seemed amiss in their bedroom, but the envelope on the bed caught his attention. His name was written across it and he knew it to be her handwriting. Thinking for a moment that she had some surprise cooked up, he allowed an absent smile to cross his lips. Sitting on their bed, he opened the envelope. Pulling out the few pages of stationary, he read her words.

'_Dear Shawn,_

_There is no other way to say this. I know you'll hate me when you finish this letter and I do not blame you. You deserve to hate me. But, please, do me one last honor and read this all the way through. Maybe then, you will understand why I've done this. Why I've left you…never to return…'_


	2. Part 2, Words of a Song:

Part II - Words of a Song:

Mimi sat uncomfortably in her seat on the plane. In a few hours, she would touch down on the island of St. Croix in the Virgin Islands. She had just walked away from her life. Her family, her friends, her education, and most important, the man she loved. Checking her watch, she was sure he was home by now. She was also sure that he had found her letter and read it. Secure, if not the least bit broken inside, with the knowledge that he would hate her, it made her decision to leave the right one.

"At least now, Shawn, Belle and Claire can be a family." - she muttered to herself; her voice carrying the bitterness and sadness she felt. "Just like they always wanted."

"_Oh, Mimi!" - Belle squealed as she wrapped her friend in a bear hug. "Everything is so perfect." - Mimi smiled; Belle Black could see the joy in anything. Not that this wasn't a joyous occasion. Belle moving into Brady's old loft, while she moved in next door with her boyfriend Rex was a great thing. For not only their independence, but also it signified how things would always be. Belle and Shawn together, and Mimi and Rex together._

_Mimi looked around the spacious loft before turning back to Belle who still had a huge smile plastered on her face. "This is great, Belle." - Mimi said. "You and Shawn here, with me and Rex across the hall. We're happy with the men we love and we're close together. Just like we dreamed when we were kids."_

"_I know." - joy radiated from Belle. "I can just see Shawn and me starting a life here. Someday a family." - Belle melted into the thought._

"That's what you've always wanted, Belle." - Mimi said aloud. "A family with Shawn." - though she was sure she didn't have any left, a tear slipped down her cheek. "Now, you'll have it."

"Excuse me?" - came from the person standing next to her seat. "Mimi?" - Mimi looked up into a pair of deep green eyes. An automatic smile came to both of their faces and Mimi stood up to hug her acquaintance.

"Jason." - she whispered as she molded her body to his.

Taken back by her softness, her need of comfort, Jason held her back a little and looked down into her eyes. When he saw the tears fighting their way through, his smile mutated to a concerned frown. Though she tried a smile to appease him, she knew he had noticed a change in her. They might not have seen each other for years, but one of Jason's most hated traits was that he would read people like a book. It was probably why he was so hated in high school. Just by looking at a person, he knew what would hurt them the most.

"Come on, sit down." - he helped her into her seat by the window again and took his next to her. "Want to talk about it?"

Shaking her head, Mimi choked back a sob. It came out as more of a bitter laugh when the sound escaped her parted lips. "Not really."

Jason nodded. He had grown up considerably since the last time they had seen each other. He had finally had enough of his own bullshit when he went away to college and his games cost him the chance at love. He had buckled down and gotten into medical school, which was where he was returning to on the island. Even without his training, he knew her well enough to leave her alone. Mimi was the type of person to have to understand her feelings before she could speak them. She would tell him. It would just take time.

"So, are you headed to St. Croix or Miami?" - Mimi asked him, trying desperately to get her mind off her troubles.

"St. Croix." - Jason answered and noticed now how Mimi fixed her eyes upon him. She noted the tan. His body, while always athletic, was lean and toned. She smiled when she saw the lazy smile. The distant gleam that used to be cast in his green orbs was no longer there. His eyes, while still dreamy, held determination. "I've lived there for…well, since we graduated high school."

"You went to college on an island?" - Mimi laughed. "I bet it was hard to concentrate."

Jason laughed softly. Mimi noticed how mature he seemed now. "It was. My first semester I ended up on academic probation." - his amused smile reached his eyes. "But then I found this really great study partner and buckled down."

Mimi studied him curiously, an eyebrow hitched. "Pretty girl, huh?" - she challenged.

"Beautiful." - Jason admitted with a laugh and drew one from her as well.

"So what happened between you and Miss Study Partner?"

"I used the wisdom she imparted on me and did the best thing I've ever done."

"What was that?" - Mimi asked, slightly intrigued.

"I married her."

At that, Mimi laughed loudly. "I'm sorry." - she apologized. "I'm just having a hard time seeing you so…"

"Grown up?" - Jason supplied.

Nodding, "Yeah." - her smile faltered a little. "It's a little hard to see you as you are now. I'm still waiting for you to pull my hair or something. I know that's wrong of me, people do change, it's just…I don't know. I'm sorry." - Jason smiled at her and she knew she was forgiven. "So, you and your wife live in St. Croix? Are you out of school?"

"We're in medical school." - Jason told her. He noticed her smile grown wider and the surprise filter into her eyes, but she held her laughter inside this time. "Her family owns land down there. She's from there. We have a house on their property. Way back on their property." - he ended with a laugh.

Mimi had never seen her friend so grown up. She felt string tugging at her heart when Jason spoke of his wife. She could see in his eyes how much he loved her and it brought her pain back. When she felt the tears ready to fall, she turned away quickly. The plane had taken off and she hadn't even noticed. She was sure they were out of Salem by now and that made everything hurt worse. Her life wasn't supposed to be this way.

Feeling a tap on her shoulder, she turned and found Jason's hand extending a tissue to her. Taking it, she smiled and thanked her stars that he hadn't asked. "So," - she began when she found her voice again. "What specialty are you going for?" - she asked, again, turning the conversation back to him.

"Psychiatry." - he answered. "I graduated with a degree in behavioral psychology." - he said proudly. "My wife wants to be a pediatrician."

"Oh, that's so great, Jason." - Mimi beamed, genuinely proud of him. "Is there a need for both of your specialties where you live?"

"Pediatricians, yes. Shrinks, we might have to move back to the States." - he joked. "There is not an overabundance of, for lack of a better word, 'crazies'…" - Mimi laughed; _how professional of him_, she thought, amused. "…but there is an overabundance of people who just need someone to listen to them. You can find those anywhere."

Nodding, Mimi chose to otherwise ignore his subtlety. "That's great, Jason." - she repeated. "You have your life together. Not everyone's that lucky."

Jason thought he heard something in her voice, but kept it to himself. She needed time. "Yeah, I'm no longer the butthead prick I was in high school." - he laughed and silence fell between them for a beat. "You know, sometimes, I want to send a letter to everyone I ever harassed in high school or whose life I made a living hell and apologize." - Mimi smiled. "But I'm afraid I'd run out of stationary."

Mimi laughed. "An apology goes a long way, Jase." - her eyes grew cloudy. "It's the first step to forgiveness."

"Yeah." - Jason agreed. "But I don't think all of them would forgive me."

"I meant the first step in forgiving yourself."

That was it. He just couldn't take it anymore. He couldn't stand to see the hurt in her eyes or hear it in her voice. Even if he couldn't fix her problem, he could listen. He would listen. "Mimi," - he called her, braced for the rebuttal he knew was coming. "I promised myself that I would leave this alone. I told myself that you needed time, but I just…I can't stand to see what this is doing to you."

"You can't help me with this, Jason." - she told him. "You can't fix what is wrong. Neither can I."

"I know that. But I can listen."

"You think I'm a 'crazy'?" - she joked with a sad grin.

"No." - Jason shook his head, determination full force in his eyes. "I think you're someone who needs someone to listen to them."

Shaking her head, Mimi was adamant. "You'll hate me. Everyone will. I hate myself." - she buried her face in her hands.

"Mimi, look at me." - Jason commanded softly. When she did, he took her hands in his and held them lightly. "I'm the last person on earth who would judge you, you know that. The crap I've pulled in my life, I have no room to judge you."

"You say that now because you don't know what I've done."

"You're forgetting a very important part of this." - he informed her. "This isn't about _me_. This is about _you_. _You_ need to feel better. _You_ need someone to listen to _you_. It just so happens that it's me. And who better? A self-proclaimed prick that has seen the error of his ways and changed his life?" - a grin split his face. "Come on, Mimi. You've got nothing to lose."

"That's true." - she agreed. "I've already lost it." - at his confused, but assuring gaze, she continued. "I've done the worst things I've ever done in my life. I lied to the man I love, I gave him information that he deserved to know before we got married that has the potential to destroy someone else's life…and then I walked away from him. I destroyed his life and just ran away."

When Mimi began to cry, Jason pulled her to him and rested her head on his shoulder. Her heart was breaking now, but that tears would soon stop and she would be able to finally talk to him. To get it out in the open and be able to put her life into perspective. She needed to be able to do that more than anything.

Holding her close, Jason let her cry. It was the release she needed.

Everything else would happen when she was ready.


	3. Part 3, The End of His World:

Part III - The End of His World:

Fists pounding on the door, Shawn bit back the irate tears that threatened to fall down his face. Fury coursed through him, as did resentment, loathing and a bit of misery. The fact that he was disturbing the other people who lived on this floor didn't matter to him. He wasn't sure what he was going to say when Philip or Belle opened the door to their loft, but that didn't matter at all. The only thing that mattered was filling the void that had been ripped into his heart. Filling the emptiness that Mimi created when she walked out on him. Filling the emptiness that only Claire, his daughter, could fill. Everything else would fall into place after he saw the child. Saw what he had been too blind to see before.

"Belle!" - he yelled. "Philip! Open the door!" - he pounded again, this time harder. He heard someone on the other side yelling for him to stop.

Swinging the door open, he was met with Belle's confused gaze. "Shawn, what is it? What's wrong?" - Philip was coming down the stairs with Claire in his arms and Shawn fought the urge to rip the child from his uncle. He stared at her. At the way her blonde locks were turning darker now. The blue in her eyes giving way to chocolate. Though she predominantly resembled Belle, Shawn could clearly see distinctive features that were his own.

"Shawn, what is this, man?" - Philip demanded to know. "Claire was just down for her nap."

"I'm sorry." - he muttered shortly, his gaze never leaving the child's face. She yawned sleepily and leaned her head against Philip's chest and Shawn clenched the letter in his hand tighter. "Mimi's gone."

"What?" - came from both Philip and Belle. "Did something happen? What happened?" - asked Belle, frantic for information. She reached out and touched Shawn's arm and he recoiled from her like she were diseased.

"Don't touch me." - he told her. He looked at her with such hatred in his eyes that fear crept into her own. "You want to know what happened? You happened. You, me, our lies…and…" - he looked back at Claire. "…our daughter." - Shawn raised his eyes just in time to see Philip's cloud over with shock. He hated to reveal it that way, but he was just as stunned when he found out all of ten minutes ago that the child was his. Holding up the letter in his hand, "Mimi's left me. She said she could no longer live with the lies and the secrets. That I deserved to know the truth about my daughter." - he turned to Belle. "The truth about _everything_."

"Shawn." - his name came out as a shallow breath. Belle's eyes diverted widely to Philip's shocked gaze. When her husband's eyes landed on her face, searching her eyes, pleading with her to dispute what Shawn had said, she knew she would never have been able to give him what he so desperately needed.

"Belle." - Philip's voice was barely as whisper when he spoke his wife's name. "Tell me what he said isn't true." - he searched her eyes again before she dropped her eyes to the floor. Philip turned his gaze, now full of betrayal, to Shawn. "Tell me you guys…"

"Philip, Belle and I never meant to hurt you." - Shawn began softly.

He noticed the way Philip held on to Claire tighter than before. He could see in his eyes that he was barely holding on by a thread. The only reason he had not gone off on a tangent was because the child was in his arms. That and the initial shock had yet to wear off. Still, Shawn couldn't deny the want, the ache, to hold his daughter. He had held the child in his arms so many times before. Played with her, gotten her to smile at him, and rocked her to sleep. Each time he felt and incredible love for her. Not simply because she was his goddaughter or because a part of his little brother lived on inside of her. No, he loved her because she was an extension of the girl he once loved and his uncle…his best friend. Somehow, to him, the birth of Belle and 'Philip's' daughter made what happened between him and Belle okay…not that he believed it was. He knew it was wrong for him and Belle to be together while she was married to Philip and he was off in hostile territory. But the birth of 'their' daughter signified that God himself had deemed Belle and Philip to be together.

That knowledge was gone now. Claire was his daughter. By some sick, twisted design the Fates had deemed that he not only lose the wife he had come to love, hurt his best friend with the information, and realize that the girl he held in such high esteem would lie to him.

He heard Philip scoff and Claire whined against him, obviously picking up on the tension between the adults in the room. The anger in his system subsided to a dull aching of regret. Sighing, "Why don't you take the baby upstairs and we can all talk about this?" - Shawn offered. "She shouldn't witness this. She doesn't deserve it."

Philip, who had been too shocked to even think clearly, respected Shawn's position. No matter the circumstances in which this situation became known, he put Claire's best interest first. Philip had no choice but to respect that. It was what a true father did.

That was when he noticed the look in Shawn's eyes.

The aching in the other man to hold the baby. Philip couldn't imagine what Shawn was going through. Finding out the way he had was probably the hardest thing Shawn ever had to face. And he had to face it alone. Mimi had left him…after revealing such delicate information. Philip couldn't imagine what this was doing to either of them. Still, he knew what he felt. His hurt may not be greater, but it couldn't be lessened either.

Turning slowly, casting an unreadable gaze at his wife, Philip carried Claire up the stairs.

Shawn began to pace. Claire was out of the room and he was free to let his anger flow. He could feel Belle's intensely sad gaze at his back and couldn't even bring himself to face her. He was afraid that he would yell at her, curse her, hurt her out of spite and he was bigger than that. He wouldn't hurt her simply because he hurt.

"Shawn." - Belle breathed his name again. He wouldn't look at her. Simply kept pacing in his spot by the door, but she noticed him tense when she said his name. "Shawn, look at me, please." - she pleaded.

Tears formed in her eyes at his demeanor but she was sure that if he could look her in the face now, he would be able to later. As far as she was concerned, Shawn finding out Claire was his daughter was a good thing. She was tired of living in denial about it. Tired of not being able to tell the world and show them just how happy she was that she was the mother of Shawn Brady's child. That had been her dream all of her life. To have a family with Shawn. She was sorry for the way Philip was hurting. Even a small part of her was sorry for the hurt Mimi was feeling…but this was her dream. Besides, Mimi knew what would happen when she told Shawn the truth. That's why she left him. She knew the pull between them would be too great for her to withstand. Shawn may have loved her, but it was no match for the dreams he and Belle shared.

"No." - came from Shawn. "I can't stand the sight of you right now, Belle." - he told her.

Though she knew he meant it and the words hurt her more than she could bear, she begged him again. "Please, look at me. Talk to me."

Taking ten calming breaths, Shawn felt he had his anger under control enough to face her. The coldness in his eyes would never fade though. The pain was still too near. "How could you do that to me, Belle?" - he asked her, his voice no higher than a whisper, but chilling nonetheless. "How could you hurt me like that? How could you hurt Philip and Mimi like that?" - he scoffed lightly. "How could I hurt them like that?"

"Shawn, this isn't your fault. Mimi…" - Belle began.

"Mimi told me the truth." - he cut her off. "Yeah, she should have told me before. Yeah, I'm angrier with her than I ever thought I would be and I'm hurt by her. But at least she told me the truth. You never did." - he started to move closer to her when he saw anger flash in her eyes. She had no right whatsoever to be angry. He stopped himself, not sure of the actions he would carry out if he got any closer to her. "And it looks like you never planned to. You were just as content to let another man raise my child."

"That's not fair." - Belle cried. "I told you I loved you. I told you I wanted you. I couldn't let you go. I would have left Philip for you. We could have raised Claire together. We could have been a family like we've always planned. But you married Mimi."

"That's right." - Shawn countered. "I married Mimi. I loved her. I still love her." - he noticed how the words brought tears cascading down her cheeks. "I will always love her. But that doesn't mean you couldn't have told me the truth about Claire. Thought I don't know why I should have expected that. You never told Philip about us."

"I was afraid to hurt him, Shawn." - Belle defended.

"You didn't want to hurt him, but you would leave him for his best friend?" - Shawn countered bitterly. "Sorry. That argument doesn't fly, Belle. Truth is, you kept our affair from him to protect yourself. Just like you kept Claire from me to protect yourself."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Think about it. You didn't want all of Salem to know you cheated on your war-hero husband to keep your 'oh-so-pristine' reputation. You didn't want anyone to think that Belle Black would stoop so low. You said nothing about Claire because you couldn't stand the thought that I just might not break it off with Mimi. That she and I would be a part of my daughter's life."

"I made Mimi godmother." - Belle countered, though deep inside she knew what he said to her was the truth. A green haze of jealousy filled her eyes at the mere thought of Mimi raising her daughter with Shawn. "She's my best friend. Of course she's a part of my daughter's life."

"Yes, but not as her stepmother. Mimi would have a hand in raising our daughter. You couldn't stand the thought of me sharing precious moments of Claire's development with anyone but you." - noting the green haze in her eyes, "You still can't. Look at you. You're so jealous you can hardly stand it. Everyone in high school used to accuse Mimi of being so jealous of you, but look at you; you can't stand the thought that she could be happy…with me. That I could be happy with her. What the hell kind of person are you?"

"I'm sorry." - was all Belle's rampantly racing mind could conjure to say. She swiped at the tears that poured down her cheek violently. "I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt anyone. I just…I loved you. I still love you. I will always love you."

Shaking his head, Shawn was full of disbelief. How could he have ever thought she was the girl of his dreams? Did she change somewhere along the way and he missed it? He had placed her so high on the pedestal without realizing she truly didn't belong there.

"Shawn," - Belle moved closer to him, braced when he moved back and Philip came back down the stairs. "I'm sorry."

"You being sorry and still loving me doesn't make this okay, Belle. It doesn't make what we did while Philip was gone any less wrong. It doesn't make you not telling me, or Philip, the truth about Claire any less wrong. And it's not going to make it right, either." - he walked over to the counter. "Philip, I'm so sorry for what she and I have done. I know that doesn't even begin to help but…" - he slammed down the letter Mimi had written him on the counter. "…maybe reading this will."

"What is it?" - Philip asked.

Turning back from the door, Shawn let the tears in his eyes fall. "It's the end of my world."


	4. Part 4a, Casting the Truth:

Part IV - Casting the Truth:

Part A:

"_I, Miriam Elizabeth, take you, Shawn-Douglas, to be my lawful wedded husband. For better and for worse. In sickness and in health. Forsaking all others; 'til death parts us." - she smiled. "I love you, Shawn."_

The memory of their wedding played slowly behind her closed lids.

"_Meems?" - Shawn called when he stepped through the doorway of their apartment. A small smile, no less arousing than his touch, came to his face at the sight before him. Mimi lay on the couch with rose petals strewn all over the floor. Soft lighting from the candles enhanced the silhouette of her scantily clad body, covered only by the thin, peach negligee she wore. "Babe…" - Shawn's voice was thick with lust when he spoke. "…what's all this?"_

_Mimi smiled, that bright, hopeful smile, and raised her hands out to him. Like a moth to a flame, Shawn was powerless to resist. He wanted to play it cool. Wanting to look at her like that for a little longer; so ready and waiting for him. But his body had full control. In two quick strides, he was at the couch. She raised up to allow him room to sit on the couch and he took her hands, turning them over and kissing her palms slowly as he sat down._

"_I'm welcoming my husband home." - she rasped out breathlessly as his tongue flicked over her wrists. When he looked up at her, his eyes ablaze with passion, her smile grew. Butterflies filled the crevices of her stomach and took flight. It simply amazed her that she had this type of power of him._

"_Are you going to welcome me like this everyday?" - he questioned huskily. Unable to deny the craving any longer, he fisted his hand in her hair and pulled her mouth crashing to his. Despite the force in which it began, the kiss was slow and deep. Shawn found that he never tired of kissing his wife. It was more than a meeting of lips with her. She was giving herself to him intimately. Bringing to surface all the desires within him to meet them with another kiss or some other way._

"_Everyday for the rest of our lives like this if you want me to." - she said when they pulled apart. Framing his face in her hands, she pulled him down on to the sofa with her._

"_Have I ever told you how happy I am that I married you?" - Shawn joked as his hand hooked lightly underneath her thigh, pulling her leg up and then wrapping it around his waist._

_With another heart stopping smile, "Yes." - her hands fumbled with the snaps of his jeans. "Though I don't think you've shown me today." - her grin was wide and wicked._

_Standing just long enough to let his jeans pool to the floor so he could step out of them, Shawn once again covered his wife's body with his own. "My mistake." - he told her. He kissed her lips softly. "Let me make up for that."_

Jason watched Mimi's face as her head rested on his shoulder. She had fallen asleep some time ago and was locked in dreams that brought a smile to her face. Smiling as he brushed the hair out of her face, he realized he would rather her be asleep and happy than awake and not. He wouldn't disturb her. Not when she smiled like that.

Besides, she would wake up soon enough.

Still, he couldn't help but wondered what she was dreaming.

"_Hey, hey, Shawn, look at me." - Mimi commanded. She had finally gotten him to calm down enough to sit in one spot. Of course, she had to sit on his lap to restrain him, knowing he wouldn't get up in a huff if it meant she might be tossed to the floor. Framing his face in her hands, she forced him to look in her eyes. "I have faith in you." - her voice was soft yet conveyed all the conviction she felt. "Just because Max is behaving like a moron chasing after Chelsea and wants out of the business doesn't mean that you can't continue on." - she placed a finger over his lips when he went to protest. She knew her husband. It was best to stop him before he began. "You've risked everything for this garage and it's going to be a success. You just have to believe that and want it bad enough."_

"_Yeah, but, Mimi, if Max leaves he's taking the working capital with him. I don't have enough money to put into this business full time."_

"_So, we'll get a loan. I'll take on an extra shift at Alice's." - she offered._

"_No, Babe." - Shawn protested. "You won't have time for classes. You barely have time as it is." - when his face fell again, and his eyes spoke of self-loathing, she had just about had enough._

"_Stop this!" - she hissed. "Stop being so down on yourself and thinking that I deserve better." - she called him on it. "I know that's what you're thinking and it isn't true. There is no better than you. I love you and I'm not going to give up on you or our marriage. I'm not going to let you give up on yourself or your dream." - silence fell between them. When she calmed down enough, she began to speak again, this time softer. "I have enough money saved that I can give you. It won't interfere with school and we can still live here. We can start checking on loans in the morning and I'll look for a better paying job in between classes and work." - looking him square in the eyes, she showed him her determination. "I'm not going to let you give up. Your business partner may be a fool, but your partner in life isn't. You've been there for me so many times before; let me return the favor."_

_Smiling, Shawn kissed her lips softly. He knew well enough now that she meant what she said. There was no point in going against her wishes. Honestly, it touched him deeply that she would fight for him so adamantly. He kept kissing her until she relaxed in his arms and smiled against his lips._

_Pulling back, he ran his fingers gently over the outline of her mouth. Kissing her smile again, he silently vowed to do whatever it took to make her smile that way at him every day for the rest of their lives._

"_Thanks, Babe." - he whispered against her lips; his brow rested upon hers._

"_For what?"_

"_For being my babe." - he told her. "For not giving up on me, not letting me give up on myself." - he kissed her again and caressed her face. "Just for being you. Loving me the way you do."_

_When he wanted, Mimi thought, he could be the most incredible man on earth. "Always, Baby." - she promised him, as well as herself. "Always."_

Waking up with a jolt, Mimi wasn't even aware that she had fallen asleep. It took her a moment to remember where she was and all that had happened before. Part of her wanted it to be a dream. Part of her wanted nothing more than to be back in Salem with Shawn. Instead of here on this airplane headed so far away from everything and everyone she's ever known. The only saving grace was that God had been generous enough to send her an angel to walk her through this transition. An angel she never had expected. Jason Welles would be cast in her book after this flight as a true hero.

Raising her head from his shoulder, she tossed a smile at her. Thought she saw pity in his eyes but it was only curiosity and worry. Her smile grew wider, grateful for that. "Where are we?" - she asked. "How long have I been asleep?"

"You've been asleep for quite a while." - he told her, taking the questions out of order. "I didn't move that big head of yours over because I didn't want to disturb you. You seemed like you needed the sleep." - she made a face at him in response to his comment about her head size. "How very mature of you, Lockhart." - he said in response to the face she made. "Currently, we are floating somewhere above the state of Texas. I have no idea why they have to make the flights so long and fly down instead of straight across. But then, I know nothing about airspace controls and restrictions and could be biased based on my sheer hatred of flying." - he tossed a charming grin her way. "Not enough leg room." - he motioned down to the small amount of space. Mimi nodded and smiled her understanding. She was much shorter than he was and her legs felt a little cramped as well.

Silence fell between them for a beat. Mimi grousing from the pain in her neck, fully waking now, and trying to find the courage to continue. She was trying so hard to not give in to her insecurities. That was why she wrote Shawn the letter in the first place. She hated who she had become. She was a liar. For all intent purposes, from the day she learned the truth, she was a liar. She had found the strength to tell Shawn the truth and to walk away from their life. Telling Jason what she had done, her reasons for running, wouldn't be nearly as bad as that.

"Brady." - Mimi said softly, her eyes staring out the window.

"I'm sorry?" - Jason looked up from his book onto her profile.

"You said Lockhart." - she told him when she brought her face around to meet his. "It's Brady."

Realization dawned. "Oh." - Jason said. More clarity came. "Ohh. Shawn is…"

"The husband I betrayed? Yes."

Book and everything else forgotten, Jason gave her his full attention. "Are you ready to tell me what happened now?" - he questioned gently; giving her time to make up her mind, showing her that he wouldn't pressure her.

"No." - she said. "I'm not ready. But I will tell you what happened anyway. Because you're right, Jason. I do need someone to listen to me. Someone who won't tell me that what I'm doing is wrong. On the other hand, maybe someone who would. It just so happens that it's you."

Jason reached over and grabbed her hand. "Whenever you're ready." - he told her and Mimi smiled at his initiative. He would make an excellent psychiatrist one day. "And remember, I won't judge you. I couldn't possibly. I just don't like to see you hurt."

Smiling again, "Thanks." - Mimi replied. "For you to fully understand the choices I've made that led me here, I'm going to have to go back a little farther than before Shawn and I got together." - at his confused gaze, Mimi bit back a smile. "I'm going to have to go back to the first time I ever lied to a man I loved."


	5. Part 4b, Casting the Truth:

Part IV - Casting the Truth:

Part B:

Jason listened intently and without interruption as Mimi ran through ex-love Rex Brady and his twin sister Cassie's arrival in Salem. He mentally patted himself on the back for remaining quiet during her rundown of history. Some of the things she told him, like how they were thought to be aliens, then thought to be DiMeras, then ultimately revealed to be part of the Brady clan had his head spinning. Then he reminded himself that it was Salem…and anything that _could_ happen in Salem…usually did.

When she began to speak about their relationship, finally getting to how everything began, he noticed how her voice carried a small hint of pain. Focusing his eyes to look at her instead of concentrating on her words, he saw the hurt in her eyes. Someone who loved as deeply and intensely as Mimi did, hurt just as much. He could remember telling her in high school that she had no backbone. That she was tagalong and Belle, Shawn, Chloe, Philip or whomever she had aligned herself with at the time was her protector. He knew even then that it was wrong; only said it to hurt her, to prey on her insecurities. However, now, he was realizing just how wrong he was. She was one of the strongest people he ever knew.

When she came to the part of how they moved in together, with Belle and Shawn across the hall, though Shawn was truly Rex's roommate, his heart broke for her. She had only loved two men in her entire lifetime. And both times, she lost them. He wondered how she carried on. Where she found the strength to pick herself up and go on with her life, full of pain, the ache of the empty void they created growing with each passing second; but thought it better not to ask her. It would remain a great mystery surrounding her.

"And then he walked away." - Mimi had just finished recanting the tale of how Rex found out about her abortion. Jason again focused on her eyes. They were so impossibly dark, glazed with anger, remorse, and regret. "He sent my letters back and everything. I tried so hard to apologize, you know. Just wanted him to know how…" - she swiped at a tear falling down her reddened cheek. "…how sorry I was for everything. Should have known he wouldn't accept them. His face…that day…when he found out." - she closed her eyes and tried to dislodge the memory. "I knew then it was over."

"Why didn't you tell him about the baby?" - Jason asked. He winced when he saw another tear slip down her cheek; sure, there was a gentler way, but he couldn't think of it.

Noticing the regret in his eyes at his brashness, Mimi offered him a small smile and he knew he was forgiven. "I don't know why." - she said. "When I found out I was so…scared, you know. But I was also…happy. I was having a baby with the man I loved. The man I knew…" - her voice fell. "…that I was going to marry." - she took the tissue he extending to her and smiled her thank you. "But when I asked him how he felt about us having children so young…or right now…he said that it wasn't the time. That it would be a bad thing, I think he said." - she lied, she remembered every word he said; it hurt just as much now as it did then. "That's when I decided not to tell him. I got it in my head that if I did tell him that he would only stay with me because I was pregnant. Then my mother found out and came up with the idea of aborting the baby. I didn't want to, but then…another evil thought entered my mind. What if I told Rex and he accused me of trapping him, not that he would have, but what if that's what he thought? What if someday in the distant future…he began to resent me?" - she shook her head at her own insecurities. They always did get the best of her. "You've met my mother before. Imagine that harping on your every fear." - silence fell. "I blamed her for a while, too. Blamed Belle for having such a huge mouth. Truth was, I just hated myself. It was my baby just as much as it was Rex's. Whether he wanted it or not, whether it was time or not…it was my baby and it deserved a chance at life. I let my own fears and insecurities and stupidity…my own brand of self-hatred cause me to kill my baby."

Silence fell between them again. Jason was awestruck in her presence. He knew that she had changed. Knew that she wasn't the same girl he grew up with. Hell, he had always known that she had an inner strength that would surface someday and give her the courage to do the right thing even in the face of tragedy. However, looking at her now, he truly believed she was the strongest woman he ever met. Yes, many women had been in her position before…but he didn't know any of them. He didn't know their history of insecurity. Their history of feeling like they never belonged. But he knew Mimi's...and he knew now that he couldn't have been prouder of her for picking herself up and carrying on with life.

"How did things with you and Shawn happen?" - he asked softly.

"We started to grow closer through our misery. He let me stay in the apartment with him after Rex moved out. It was after everything that happened with him, Jan, Philip and Belle." - at Jason's hitched eyebrow, "It's a longer story than this one and I'll tell it to you later. Anyway…" - she continued on. "Philip and Belle were married and she was pregnant and just had everything I ever wanted…but that's beside the point. She told Shawn that she couldn't be with him. That it wasn't fair to Philip…that she loved Philip, was his wife, carrying his child, and didn't want to hurt him that way. Shawn just gave up. We started spending time together. At first, commiserating. Then…we found our friendship again. We developed feelings for one another." - she shook her head and cleared her throat when she thought the sob would escape. "To make a long story short, Shawn and I decided to get married. Because of our relationship, though I'm not sure if this is at all possible, our relationship sparked something in Belle that brought on Post-Partum Depression. While she was struggling with that, Claire got really sick and through an accidental death, Shawn's little brother Zack saved her life." - nodding at Jason's stunned and saddened gaze, Mimi continued. "That's when I put two and two together. Shawn himself had turned out to be a match for the baby. I knew that he was her father. Kate Roberts and my mother figured it out, too."

"Shawn is the father of Belle's baby." - Jason stated, not sure he fully believed it. Mimi studied his eyes, waiting to see the hatred fill them. It never came.

Mimi nodded. "I knew it long before we got married and I didn't tell him. I let my mother and Kate badger me into not saying anything. Kate didn't want Philip to lose his wife; you know how she is when it comes to her children." - Jason nodded. "And my mother didn't want me to ruin my one chance at happiness."

"Those were their reasons," - Jason began softly. "What were yours?"

"Same reasons I had for not telling Rex about the baby. I was scared. I told myself that once Shawn found out he would leave me for Belle. I didn't believe he loved me enough. I knew he loved me…just…not enough. I had no faith in his love. In his ability to choose whom he wanted to be with. I had no faith in myself."

"But you do now." - Jason told her. "Otherwise you wouldn't have said anything. I admire you, Mimi."

Scoffing, "For what? I lied to him. Kept the truth about his daughter from him. He deserved to know. As did Philip and Bo and Hope…and everyone. No one deserves to be lied to like that. What could you possibly be admiring me for?"

"Your strength." - he told her. When she shot him a disbelieving glance, "You can deny it all you want, and I know you probably will, but one day you will see just how strong you are. It takes courage to do what you did, Meems. Yeah, you should have told him the truth. I can't say that your decision not to was right or wrong, it's not my place to. That's something you have to come to terms with on your own and I think you have. I think you made the right choice in finally telling him, because you're right, he does deserve to know. That itself took great courage. Even with your doubts and your fears, you thought enough of him to tell him the truth. It doesn't matter when you decided to do it, you did it. That's more than Belle can say, and I'm sure, as smart as she is, she knew the truth as well." - when Mimi simply looked away, Jason knew he was right. "And then, you did something not a lot of people would ever do. You walked away from your life. When so many people have walked away from you, it takes even more strength to do it yourself."

"I walked away because I knew he was going to go to Belle. They're going to be a family like they have always wanted. I couldn't stand to see that. I walked away for my own selfish reasons."

"I don't think so." - Jason countered. "You're not a selfish person. Yeah, you have your moments where you want what you want, but everyone does. I think you walked away to finally give Shawn the chance to make up his mind. Whether he wants a life with you or a family with Belle."

"Shawn and Belle have always loved each other. They belong together."

"See, that right there…that bitterness you conveyed just then shows me that you don't believe it. You know that Shawn isn't with a person unless he wants to be with them. He chose you, Mimi. For whatever reasons that only he and God know, he chose you. That says something. And the fact that you would step aside…again…to let him and Belle be together when you love him shows just how selfless you are."

"I want him to be happy."

"But you don't think that he can be with you?" - Jason asked. He tilted his head to the side and studied her. "You and Shawn have good moments in your marriage? Moments where it was just the two of you depending on one another?" - Mimi nodded reluctantly. "You and Shawn had a life, Mimi. A life he chose. I think you walked away because you're not sure if he 'chose' you because he really wanted you or because he couldn't have Belle. And you want to give him the chance to make up his mind."

Unable to hold it in any longer, Mimi let the tears flow. Jason wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. "I'm so lost, Jason. I've never felt so lost before. I don't know how to face life on my own. I don't know if I can." - she cried against his chest.

"Shh," - he soothed her. Running his fingers through her hair, "You can. You're the strongest person I know, Meems. You'll handle anything life throws at you. You'll be okay. Whether Shawn chooses you or not, you'll find a way to carry on. You have too much vivacity to just give up."

"My heart…" - a powerful sob tore from her lips.

"Shh. I know your heart is broken. It's still breaking. But it'll heal, honey, I promise." - he rocked her gently. "Shh, don't cry. I hate to see you cry." - finally having had enough of being serious, "Besides, this is an expensive shirt and I don't want you ruining it with your tears."

Her sobs turned to laughter against his chest. Raising her head, she patted at the wet spot her tears created. "You rich boys and your expensive clothing. You're all spoiled."

Shrugging, Jason tossed her a charming, warm grin. "Hey, have to look good for the wife. Can't have her losing interest."

"She'd be crazy to leave you, Jase. You tell her I said it, too." - Mimi challenged.

"You can tell her when we land. She's picking us up at the airport."

"Us?" - Mimi questioned. "No, wait, hey, Jason, I don't think…"

"Miriam, you're a friend. I'm not going to let you start a new life in a place you've never been all alone. There are some really bad parts of town."

Mimi knew he was serious. That was the only time he said her full name. Still, she found herself protesting. "But you and your wife…"

"Have a huge house." - he cut her off. "Not to mention a guest house. We do entertain occasionally when we're not busting our asses at the hospital. You can use it for as long as you like." - Mimi bit her bottom lip, trying to find a way out. "And it's not charity. Just help. Everybody needs a little help now and then. Don't be so proud that you can't accept it from me."

Mimi smiled again, sure her face was about to start hurting from all the smiling and crying she was doing. She pulled him into an embrace and held him close. She thanked God for putting him on that plane. She was sure she didn't deserve any mercy after all that she had done, but God had given her an angel when she needed one the most. "Thank you, Jason." - she whispered against the shell of his ear.

"For what?" - he asked, shrugging off her gratitude.

"For helping me put my life into perspective. For giving me answers where I couldn't find any." - she pulled back to look into his eyes. "For listening to me."

Jason stared at her for a second. His heart swelling with pride at her conviction. She was a lot stronger than anyone gave her credit for. He leaned forward a little and kissed her cheek softly. "You're welcome, Miriam."


	6. Part 5a, Clarity:

Part V - Clarity:

Part A:

"_...I guess what I'm trying to say, Shawn is that...I hate myself more than you ever could for hurting you the way I have. You probably won't believe this, but I wanted to tell you the truth the moment I found out. And the only answer I can give you as to why I didn't...was...fear. Fear of losing you, fear of being alone, fear of...oh, God, fear of everything. That's no excuse, I know, and believe me, I'll spend the rest of my life hating myself. But, maybe someday, you can find it in your heart to forgive me. I don't deserve it, but holding on to hatred is like a disease. It'll just eat away at you and you deserve more than that. I'll love you forever, Shawn. Whether you love or hate me after today or not, I'll always love you and want you to be happy._

_Perhaps, someday, we'll meet again. _

_Love always,_

_M."_

Shawn remembered every word of her letter to him verbatim. However, the last part of the letter was the part that would be forever emblazoned in his mind. He could just see her at the desk in their apartment, crying as she wrote those words. Every stroke filled with an agony that had become unbearable. His heart ached for her. Broke in half for the pain she felt for hurting him. Where others would tell him to be angry, to cry hatred, he felt lower than he ever had before. He loved her and she was suffering. Whether she was wrong or not, she felt pain and he hurt because of it.

"_Babe, what is it?" - Shawn's voice was full of concern. Mimi sat on the couch crying, clutching a letter in her hands. "What's wrong?" - he had been in the kitchen washing dishes. He heard a sob escape her the moment he shut the water off and rushed over to her._

"_This letter." - Mimi said as Shawn pulled her close to him. She melted into his embrace, finding comfort in the circle of his arms. She wiped at the tears falling down her cheek as she pulled back. "It's from my father." - rubbing soothing circles on the small of her back, Shawn silently urged her to continue, though he really didn't need to. He knew how Mimi felt about her father. "Six years, Baby." - Mimi said after a moment. "Six years since he's left. Not a phone call, not a damn birthday card or a damn e-mail. Then, out of the blue he sends me this letter telling me he's remarried and is expecting a baby with his new wife." - she looked up into her husband's face. "He wants me to be happy for him. Happy for him? How the hell can I be happy for him because he's starting a new family...after he left the old one? He didn't just leave my mother. He left all of us." - she shot off the couch, more angry now than sad, but that didn't stop the tears._

_Shawn's hand shot out quickly and caught her wrist. He stood with her, but didn't allow her passage to move. Instead, he pulled her closer, allowing her angry tears to fall on his shoulder. "Why didn't he want me, Shawn?" - Mimi asked through a painful sob. "Why wasn't I good enough?"_

"_Shh, Babe." - Shawn soothed her. "It's not you. It's him. He's the fool. He'll never know what a wonderful daughter he has. He'll never know the incredible woman you grew up to be." - he felt her scoff against his shoulder and held her back just enough to allow her to look in his eyes. "I mean it." - he said while framing her face. "You're an incredible woman. And he'll never know that because he took the coward's way out and left."_

"_Why does everyone I love leave me?" - she asked, the agony in her voice and the words nearly broke his heart in two._

"_I'll never leave you." - he vowed. _

_Something akin to fear flickered in her eyes. "Promise?" - she stared up into his eyes innocently, fragile._

"_I promise, Babe." - Shawn leaned forward and kissed her lips softly. "Stop crying, please." - he begged against her lips. "I die inside when you hurt." _

Bo and Hope Brady shared timid glances between themselves as they sat at the kitchen table with their son. He had been there nearly an hour. From the moment they opened the front door, they knew something was wrong. The looks in his eyes and the tears he couldn't hide were evident of that fact. He cried for nearly thirty minutes before he ever told them what happened. The entire situation tore their hearts on so many levels. The first, and most important, being their son was in pain. He was hurt by the woman he loved, the ex he would always love and everyone else who knew the truth about Claire being his daughter. The pain in Shawn's voice when he revealed that was only surpassed by the amount of pain conveyed in his voice when he told them Mimi had left him. Bo and Hope both knew how much that could hurt a person and they never wanted their son to know that pain.

They didn't know whether to be angry at Mimi for leaving their son when he needed her most, or to admire her for giving Shawn the space he needed.

"Shawn," - Hope's voice was sensitive when she called her son's name. "I know that you are still hurting and...I don't blame you, but...have you given any thought to what you're going to do?"

Shawn raised his eyes to meet his mother's gaze. His reddened eyes, still full of anguished tears, nearly had her in tears herself. He couldn't think clearly. His mind had been a mess since he read his wife's letter. How could she just leave? Not even stay to work it out? How could she be afraid of losing him...and then walk away herself? He knew the answer, and it was plain to see. She was afraid he would leave her for Belle. Afraid she wasn't strong enough to get over losing him to her best friend again.

"I don't know. I still haven't fully...accepted the fact that I'm Claire's father." - his voice was an emotional whisper. He swatted at tears that had yet to fall and buried his face in his hands. "I don't know what to do. I don't...Mimi was the levelheaded one." - tears clouded his eyes again. Mimi would know exactly what to do. "What am I going to do without her?"

It was Bo's turn to be sensitive. "Do you have any idea where she is?"

Shawn shook his head. "Her letter didn't say." - he got up from the table to pace. "God, how could she just leave me? How could she not even stay to..."

"To what, Shawn? To watch you leave her? To watch you hate her?" - came from Hope.

He gave his mother a confused look and stopped pacing. "I could never hate her. How could she, or you, think that?" - he looked to Bo and his father's expression was the same as his mother's. "You both think I could hate her? She's my wife. I love her."

"We know you love her." - Bo said, immediately regretting his cavalier attitude. "You wouldn't have married her if you didn't."

"So, what?" - Shawn wasn't about to let it go. "You think I don't love her enough? That I'm not in love with her? Or that because she lied to me, my feelings for her would fade away? I don't understand."

"It was a pretty big lie, Shawn." - said Hope; she knew it wasn't what Shawn wanted to hear, but it needed to be said.

"And you've never lied to Dad?" - Shawn questioned. He looked at Bo. "And you've never lied to Mom?" - he resumed pacing, trying hard to gain clarity in this clouded mess. "I love her. I know she was wrong and she knows it, too. But...I love her. I can't explain it. You guys have been through hell and back...did you stop loving each other?" - both his parents shared and look and shook their heads. "Exactly. So why should I stop loving Mimi?"

"It's not that we didn't think you loved Mimi, or even that you should stop. I'm sure the two of you can work this out. If that's really what you want.." - Hope began down a path she knew her son never wanted to tread. "It's just that..." - she shared another look with her husband.

"We thought you would always love Belle more." - Bo finished his wife's sentence. Shawn stopped pacing again and stared at both his parents. "I mean, Shawn, you and Mimi got married, what, less than a year after everything between Belle and Philip happened?"

"We didn't think that you were fully over Belle. Or over losing her to Philip."

"You thought I married Mimi to forget Belle." - Shawn stated. "Married her because I couldn't have Belle." - he shook his head and cast his eyes to the floor. A soft chuckle escaped his parted lips before he looked at them again. "A few seconds ago, when you said that to me, I would have denied it. Any point since I fell in love with Mimi, I would have denied it. Truth is...you're right. I wasn't over Belle or over losing her to Philip when we married but...somewhere along the way...I fell so far in love with her. She became...everything to me."

His next statement was cut off by the doorbell. He walked quickly to the door, just a small amount of hope that it would be Mimi filled him, but he knew otherwise. He was finally gaining a little clarity to Mimi's thinking. A little clarity to his own.

Opening the door, he was met with a saddened expression upon a deep pair of blue eyes. Sighing heavily, he leaned against the door. "Philip." - he greeted his uncle on the other side.

"I figured I'd find you here." - came softly from Philip. Shawn saw that Philip's eyes were just as red from crying and filled with less anger than he thought. The anger was displaced by shock, sadness and remorse.

"Yeah." - Shawn breathed out. He stepped aside to allow Philip entrance into the house. "I've been expecting you. Come on in and let's talk."


	7. Part 5b, Clarity:

Part V - Clarity:

Part B:

Philip was torn. He didn't know whether to hit Shawn or to break down crying in his nephew's arms. Truth be told, he felt like doing both...and not in that particular order. He wandered around for a little after Shawn left the loft. He had placed Claire in her crib and began to return downstairs when he heard Belle's voice carry up to the top of the stairs. Speaking words he knew he'd never forget. Words that hurt him more than words ever should have.

"_That's not fair." - Belle cried. "I told you I loved you. I told you I wanted you. I couldn't let you go. I would have left Philip for you. We could have raised Claire together. We could have been a family like we've always planned. But you married Mimi."_

He remembered hearing Shawn's response to that. He married Mimi, he loved Mimi, and that he would always love her. He didn't have to see Belle to know the jealousy was in her eyes. When Shawn left, Bell had tried to talk to him. To get him to come to her side or rather to see her side.

"_Philip." - Belle whispered his name. "I'm so sorry." - she went to touch him and he recoiled._

"_I asked you if you still loved him." - Philip stated calmly, though his blood was boiling. "I asked you before we got married. You lied to me then." - he could hide the tears in his eyes as his blood ran cold. He stepped away when she tried to touch him again. "I knew that you had feelings for him. That you always would. I just thought, you know, if I loved you enough..." - his voice quavered a little but he quickly recovered. Belle was crying but her tears didn't affect him now. "...that maybe one day, you'd love me back." - he shook his head. "I was a damn fool for thinking that."_

"_I do love you, Philip." - she proclaimed. "I do love you."_

"_But not like you love him. Never like you love him." - he scoffed, seems they had this conversation before. "I tried and I tried but I never got anywhere. You could never open your heart to the possibility that I could be the one for you. That we could fall in love. It was just Shawn. You only wanted Shawn. Even though you saw how happy he was with Mimi."_

_Her eyes took that jealous haze again. "Mimi hurt him."_

"_And you didn't?" - he countered. "You knew the truth about Claire." - he stared at her in disbelief. "She and I have always been consolation prizes to you. We were what you got because Shawn decided to marry Mimi. You didn't care about me bonding with her or her bonding with me and the fact that she and I could grow to love each other because you couldn't have Shawn. He was right when he said that you couldn't stand the thought of Mimi being a part of her life as her stepmother, but you would rather another man raise the child of the man you love...as her father? You would keep the truth in the dark, costing your daughter precious moments with her biological father all because you didn't want your best friend helping in raising her." - he shook his head and moved toward the door. _

"_Philip, wait!" - Belle stopped him. "Please, don't go."_

_Standing at the door, his back to her, Philip realized he couldn't even stand to look at her. "You know what's funny? I never thought Shawn deserved you. The way he treated you when he came back to Salem after everything with Jan. I thought he was..." - he turned and did face her. Both their blue eyes red from crying. "I was looking at you through rose-colored glasses." - he shook his head; his face taking on a disgusted expression. "I see you now, Belle. I don't like what I see." _

He left after saying that. He walked to the park and sat on the bench to read Mimi's letter to Shawn. Read how she loved him and hated herself for hurting him. Read as she tried to explain her reasons for keeping this secret. He could actually see her there trying to figure them out as he read. Read as she begged for forgiveness for not only herself but for Belle. Belle was Claire's mother and as such would always be in his life. Philip remembered feeling awestruck at that. Mimi was simply a remarkable person. Even with the thoughts of Shawn and everyone else hating her, she wanted him to forgive Belle. To make it work with her, not only for his sake...but for Claire's.

He left after reading that and headed to the Brady house, sure Shawn was there.

Stepping into the Brady home, the words of Mimi's letter struck a chord in his heart.

"_I think, maybe deep down inside, I've always been a little jealous of Belle. I mean, she has the world at her fingertips. But, that doesn't excuse what I've done. I'm just trying to...come up with an answer to this nagging question. Why did I do it? Why didn't I tell you that you were the father of Belle's baby? Truth is, Shawn, and I think I've grown enough to admit this, jealousy was a huge part of it. Belle has everything. The love of her family, a husband who adores her, a beautiful baby girl that belongs to my husband...and even my husband's love. Yes, jealousy was a huge factor."_

Mimi was the bigger person between the two friends he realized. Where she would admit she was jealous, own up to her faults and embrace the possibility that maybe they held meaning, Belle would deny them. He knew his wife was jealous of Mimi's relationship with Shawn. You'd have to be blind not to see that, but it went much deeper than he thought. It wasn't just that Belle had lost her first love to her best friend; it was she had lost Shawn's love. That special place in his heart that was reserved only for her now belonged to Mimi. They both had been so lost and broken when they sought out to console each other. They found in each other the peace and strength they needed so badly. Looking into Shawn's face, Philip could see his nephew was just as lost as he felt.

But he was here for a reason.

Shawn was now revealed to be the father of his little girl.

And he needed to know if he would take her away like he took his wife.

"Bo. Hope." - Philip greeted his half-brother and sister in-law. They stood to leave and he stopped them. "You don't have to go. I'm sure you know what's going on. I'm sure Shawn has told you that he's..." - the words choked him. He couldn't say them. The words to him were some vile concoction that he swallowed and couldn't digest. The mere thought that he hadn't had any part in making that angelic creature tore his heart to shreds. Her golden hair, her porcelain face, those enchanting blue eyes placed so perfectly in her head. That child was not his, but he couldn't love her more if he tried.

"Yeah." - Shawn said, knowing how hard it was for Philip to say the words. Truth was, it was just as hard for him. "They know."

"I'm sorry, Philip." - Hope's voice and eyes were tender as she looked on the young man. "It's a bad situation for all."

Nodding, his eyes cast to the floor, Philip missed the subtle nod Shawn gave his parents. He and Philip needed to be alone. He waited until they were out of earshot before speaking again. "Hit me." - Shawn whispered to his uncle.

Philip looked at him confused, dazed. "What?"

"Hit me." - Shawn said firmly now. He opened his arms widely. "Come on, Philip, and hit me."

No one would ever have believed that Shawn was asking a trained marine to hit him, but he needed to know exactly what was in Philip's head. If maybe they could move past the anger and the initial thoughts of violence, perhaps some type of reasonable agreement could be met between the two men.

"What?" - Philip's face was the picture of confusion.

"Hit me!" - Shawn continued. "I deserve it. Come on, man, I slept with your wife. You were off fighting a war and I slept with your wife." - anger flashed briefly in Philip's eyes but he made no move against Shawn. "I'm the father of the little girl you thought was your own."

Something akin to murderous rage now flashed in Philip's eyes. He raised his fist to hit Shawn but nothing happened. He simply stared at his nephew. Stared at him a long while before lowering his fist. Stared at him even more as tears clouded his blue orbs and he sank to the couch. "I can't hit you." - Philip breathed out; the pain evident in his voice. "It wouldn't change anything. You'd still be Claire's father."

Shawn stood there and watched as his trained marine, formerly anger driven, and war-hero uncle cried like a baby. Shawn's heart went out to Philip. In all of this, he and Claire were the truly innocent ones and their lives were being ripped apart. They didn't deserve this. None of them did.

"You're the father of my little girl." - Philip stated, more upset now than angry. He looked up to Shawn with frenzied confusion. "How? How can I not have had any part in making something I love so much? I'm as much her father as you are." - he was defensive now. "I know her favorite toy. How she likes to be held. Did you know that she can't sleep after she takes a bath? That she loves the water. She's like..." - a small pleasant smile came to his face at the thought. It faded just as quickly. "...a little fish." - he looked over to Shawn again who had sat down beside him. Tears began to slip down both their cheeks. "Please don't take my little girl, Shawn. Please." - he begged his nephew. "I don't think I could recover from losing her. She's my world. She's my whole world."

"I'm not going to take her from you, Philip." - Shawn vowed. "I never planned to take her from you."

Relieved, if only for the moment, Philip breathed a little easier. He believed him, he didn't know why, but he believed him. "What are you going to do?"

Shaking his head, "I don't know yet." - he answered. "I..." - his thoughts drifted to Mimi. "I don't know." - silence fell between them for a long moment. Neither man knew what to say, to do, nor how to move on. The fact that they weren't beating the crap out of each other showed signs of growth. The fact that they were at least attempting to work it out showed just how far they had come in their relationship. "I do want to be a part of our daughter's life. I want her to know me as her father." - Shawn said after a moment. He looked over to Philip. "But I'm not going to take her from you. I want you to be a part of her life, too. She deserves to have all the love she can get." - he saw Philip's gaze cloud over with emotions. "I mean it. I don't know what's going to happen between you and Belle." - his own face fell. "Or me and Mimi but...whatever happens, Claire will get all the love she deserves. Just because the adults in her life are confused and intent on making their own lives hell...doesn't mean we're going to make hers one."

Philip was surprised, but kept it to himself. He hadn't realized just how much his nephew had grown up. He was sure it was Mimi's doing. He could see that it was. "I still love her."

Shawn nodded. "I know." - he replied softly.

"I was talking about Claire."

Because he knew he was lying, Shawn simply nodded again. "I know." - he lied.

"I didn't think it was possible for me to love anything or anyone as much as I love...our daughter, but I do."

Shawn allowed a small smile to cross his lips. Through all the hurt, betrayal and confusion...there was love. The love of Claire that kept everyone speaking to one another. Mimi's love for her goddaughter and her husband finally allowed her to tell the truth. Shawn's love of his newfound daughter, his uncle and his wife had him not suing Belle and Philip for full custody. It had him not filing for divorce. Philip's love of Claire had him willing to work it out with another man who staked claim to the little girl who so captured his heart. Love was more powerful than anything. And if Mimi had taught him anything...it was that love conquered all.

"I still love Belle, too." - Philip broke into Shawn's thoughts. "I don't know what that means to you or to...her, but..."

"I'm so sorry, Philip." - Shawn said. "So sorry for Belle cheating on you with me. It was wrong, and we knew it even then; we just..." - he sighed heavily. "That's no excuse. And I know 'sorry' doesn't even begin to make it hurt less, but..."

"Do you still love her?" - Philip interrupted him. "Do you still love my wife?"

If he had been asked that at any point before today, he would have denied any feelings, love or otherwise, for Belle. But today, today was about truth. It was about seeking it out, admitting it and accepting it. He wouldn't lie to Philip now. "I'll always love Belle." - he said softly. "She was my first love. A huge part of my life and...the mother of our daughter. But am I in love with her?" - Shawn shook his head. "No. I am completely, shamelessly, hopelessly in love with my wife." - he sighed again. "I just wish she knew that."

"She doesn't?" - Philip asked. He knew for a fact that Mimi knew Shawn loved her.

"She doesn't know how much I love her." - he clarified. "That I choose her above all else. I didn't do a very good job of making that known to her. There have always been three people in this marriage. Me, her and Belle. And that was my fault. Instead of making Belle let me go, making her see just how happy I was with Mimi, I coddled her. I don't know. We were on automatic pilot or something. I figured things didn't have to change that much since Mimi and I married and that was wrong. Truth is, I wasn't truly over Belle or over losing her to you when Mimi and I married."

"So, you both have had that and the secret about Claire between you this whole time?" - Philip asked, though it was more of a statement. He couldn't believe he was about to give marriage advice to his nephew, when his own marriage was in dire straits, when he didn't know whether his own wife loved him or not, but there was no point in a marriage that actually has a chance at survival simply giving up. "Do you know where she is?"

Shawn shook his head. "Her letter didn't say."

"But you could find out." - Philip hinted.

"Yeah." - Shawn agreed. "But I don't think she wants me to. I think she wants to give me some space to figure out what I want...and give her the chance to do the same."

"I've read her letter." - even as he said it, he pulled it out of is pocket and handed it to Shawn. "She knows what she wants. It's you. I think her leaving was just her giving you a chance to make a choice. She removed herself from the equation to see if you would factor her in." - silence fell for a beat. "So, what do you want?" - Philip asked. "A life with Mimi or a family with Belle?"

It didn't even take him a moment to consider. "I want my wife." - Shawn answered while staring Philip straight in the eye. "I want my wife back."

Philip smiled at Shawn, proud of him even in the midst of all the chaos. "So, go get her."

"_...I keep hoping that someday we will meet again. That one day you'll be able to look at me again and think that I was once your friend. No matter where life takes us, Shawn, I always want to be your friend. And if we never meet again, know that I will look back on our life together and I won't cry, but smile. Because your love made me a better person. And the memories of what we shared together...will carry me through." _

Shawn smiled at the possibility of finding out where Mimi was and going to her. Showing her that he chose her and only her.

"_I, Shawn-Douglas, take you, Miriam Elizabeth, to be my lawful wedded wife. For better and for worse. In sickness and in health. Forsaking all others; until death parts us." - he smiled. "I love you, Mimi."_

He felt Philip's strong hand squeezing his shoulder reassuringly and opened his eyes to meet his uncle's gaze. When their eyes locked, Philip simply repeated his statement. It was so obvious Shawn couldn't live without her, and he knew Mimi felt the same.

There would be no secrets between them now.

No questions or hidden feelings.

Only love.


	8. Part 6a, Only Love:

Part VI - Only Love:

Part A:

_There was a soft knock on the loft door and Belle rushed to answer it. Adjusting Claire on her hip, she opened the door and was met with Mimi's stoic gaze. The two friends, who had been like sisters once upon a time, stared at each other with contempt in each pair of eyes. Mimi's gaze landed on Claire and the remorse that always came when she saw the baby filled her. She saw Belle hold the baby tighter, a gleam in her eyes, and Mimi wondered silently how a lifetime of friendship came down to this._

"_Mimi." - Belle tried to keep her voice casual and light, but failed miserably. "What's are you doing here?" - she moved away from the door when Claire began to fuss; obviously picking up on the tension filling her mother._

"_I came to tell you that you've won." - Mimi said as she stepped inside and closed the door behind her. She didn't advance any further; she truthfully had no intention of setting foot in the home Belle shared with her husband and daughter. However, the words she were about to say, she knew Belle never wanted anyone to hear...and she would allow Belle one last courtesy._

_Belle turned back after placing Claire in her playpen and stared at Mimi with a narrowed gaze. "What have I won?" - she asked, slightly bemused._

_Mimi scoffed, wondering had Belle always been this much of a bitch and if so, how did she miss it? "The chance to reclaim the great love of your life." - Mimi said, hoping the anger and bitterness she felt did indeed show. "I've told Shawn the truth about Claire...and he's going to hate me for it."_

_Belle stared at the other woman before speaking. Searching her eyes, reading her; Mimi was always so easy to understand. She wore her heart on her sleeve. "Why now after everything?" - Belle asked._

"_Because I love him." - was Mimi's simple answer. "I love him and he deserves to know the truth."_

_Belle nodded sagely. When Claire began to coo contentedly, Belle ran her hands softly through her daughter's hair and looked at Mimi again with that gleam in her eyes. "I'm sorry, Mimi." - she tried to sound sympathetic and again failed miserably. "I really am."_

_Mimi scoffed and rolled her eyes. "No, you're not, Belle. You've wanted Shawn your entire life. You've wanted a family with him your entire life. Now, you'll have it. That's the way it was meant to be." - she noticed a small smile begin to curl the corner of her friends lips. "No matter whose life had to be destroyed in the process."_

_Anger flashed in Belle's eyes. She crossed her arms over her chest defensively, but stayed in her spot. "You knew what was going to happen when you married him, Mimi. You knew how he would react once he learned the truth and you married him anyway. I'm sorry for your hurt, I truly am, but I will not take the blame for ruining your life."_

"_I'm not asking you to take blame for ruining my life. I did that all on my own." - she agreed and saw in Belle's eyes that gleam again. She had yet figured out what it was, but she knew she didn't like it. "But you are ruining Philip's life...and you should take blame for that. You led him on for months when Shawn was away. Led Shawn on for months when he came back. Then you and Shawn did...whatever...while Philip was fighting a war and instead of you telling him the truth and maybe sparing him some pain, you lied and continued on. You're playing with your daughter's life. Allowing her to bond with another man as her father while wanting to rip them apart and the drop of a hat." - Mimi's eyed blazed with anger. "You should take blame for that. You should be sorry for that."_

"_I am." - Belle whispered. "Philip's a..."_

"_Please don't say he's a good man, Belle." - Mimi cut her off. "You have no idea how good a man Philip or Shawn is. And you don't deserve either of them." - she yanked the door open and was about to leave when Belle stopped her._

"_And you do?" - Belle asked, snidely, and Mimi figured out what that gleam was. It was the gleam of a spoiled, pampered bitch who never had to fight or work for anything. A lifetime of friendship and Mimi realized she didn't know or like Belle at all._

_Turning to face her former friend, Mimi felt stronger than she had in a long time. "No. I don't deserve Shawn. I don't deserve his love, compassion, understanding, trust or friendship; and I'll regret for the rest of my life pissing all over that." - silence fell between them. "But if Shawn never forgives me, or decides he never wants to see me again, I'll at least be able to look at myself in the mirror. I'll have my self-respect and maybe someday somebody can love me again. But you, Belle, no matter how much love you and Shawn share, you'll always have the fact that you would have allowed another man to raise his child as their own because you couldn't stand the thought of Shawn being with me."_

She slammed the door and never looked back.

Sitting on the porch of the home Jason shared with his wife, Mimi let the memory of her last encounter with Belle wash away all the persisting bitterness she felt. Staring out onto the beautiful horizon, she felt a little more at peace than when she first arrived two days ago. She was sure Shawn had gotten her letter and had gone to Belle. Everyone in Salem now knew that she was liar and they hated her for it. Now, more than ever, she was glad she was thousands of miles away. No points and stares passed her way. No whispering behind her back. Yes, she was glad she escaped that.

But...part of her felt like a coward. Felt like she deserved the whispers and the stares and the pointing.

She had taken the coward's way out, like her father before her, and left.

"Miriam." - she heard the soft lilting accent calling her name and turned her head toward the door and found Jason's wife standing there. On the plane, when Jason said his wife was beautiful, he was doing her an injustice. His wife, Mimi decided upon seeing her, was some type of exotic goddess. Long, jet-black hair that cascaded down her back. She was tall, easier taller than Mimi, about Jason's height with legs that went on for days. Wide hips, taut stomach, perfect breasts, a swan-like neck, delicate facial features, a creamy caramel brown complexion, and a pair of emerald eyes that shined like the brightest jewel. She was smart, funny and just a perfect match for Jason. Mimi had never seen a couple so obviously made for one another. "Here's your tea, love."

Mimi smiled as she sat down in the chair next to hers. "Thanks, Samara." - she said before she sipped the hot liquid. As soon as the hot, mint taste exploded on her taste buds, Mimi's eyes drifted to a close. "That's excellent." - she whispered and opened her eyes to see Samara smiling at her.

It had only been two days, but Mimi felt an immediate connection with Samara. When she picked Mimi and Jason up at the airport, she noticed that Mimi had been crying.

"_Are you alright?" - Samara asked Mimi. Pulling a handkerchief out of her purse, she handed it to her husband's friend. Jason had gone to get the bags and left the two women to get acquainted._

"_Yes," - Mimi lied as she took the tissue. "I'm fine, thank you." - she turned her head but could still feel Samara's eyes studying her. "It's the first time I've ever been so...far away from home." - Mimi said after a moment of silence ; she turned back around and tried a smile. "I'm a little frightened."_

"_Don't be." - Samara told her; her accent thick and husky. "You have the spirit of a warrior. You'll find your way." - she appeared to be reading her. "Even warriors get weary sometimes, Miriam. But they never give up. It's simply not a part of them to give up. Remember that."_

_Nodding, Mimi chose to not delve too far into Samara's meaning. Still, the words the other woman spoke struck a chord deep within her. "Thanks for letting me crash at your guest house until I find a place. That's really generous of you...and Jase."_

_Samara smiled, a beautiful crooked smile, and said, "Oh, please, don't mention it. Any friend of my husband's...who can still stand him that is...is a friend of mine."_

"_She meant that as a compliment to you," - Jason began as he wrapped an arm around his wife's waist; the baggage attendant was behind them with the cart full of luggage. "But, I fail to see the compliment at the mention I received." - he kissed her cheek gently. "Why is that, Sama?"_

"_It was a compliment to you, sweetheart." - Samara began with a wink to Mimi. "If Miriam still likes you then you must be doing something right." - Jason narrowed his eyes between them; both beautiful women standing before him, their faces the picture of innocence. He began to walk away with Samara and Mimi, who had linked arms, laughing and trailing behind._

The memory faded from behind Mimi's closed lids and she was again met with Samara's gaze when she opened her eyes. She smiled, warmly, the sunlight beating down on her face and felt a greater sense of peace. "Thanks for letting me stay here." - she said again. "It really means a lot to me."

"Of course, love." - Samara replied. "You looked lost in thought when I came back out. You thinking about your husband again?"

"Always." - Mimi whispered. "I'm always thinking about him."

"You miss him, Miriam. You miss him like air. Why don't you call him. At least tell him your alright."

Mimi shook her head. "No. He wouldn't want to hear from me. I'm...I'm sure he hates me."

"You don't sound too sure." - Samara pointed out.

Knowing truth to be in that statement, Mimi felt it best to leave it alone. Changing the subject, "Do you and Jason have to go to the hospital tonight?"

"Yeah, we're doing the night shift. You still want the information about the nursing program?"

Mimi nodded. "Yeah, please. I don't know how I'm going to pay for it since I haven't found a job yet, but..." - she checked her watch. "Where is Jason? I haven't seen him all day." - an absent smile crept across her lips. "Don't tell me he's still asleep."

Samara laughed and tried to hide the amusement in her eyes. "No, he went out. Said he had something to pick up." - she grabbed Mimi's wrist and checked the time. "He should be back by now." - she commented; her brow creased in confusion.

On cue, Jason's car came speeding down the path leading from the main house. Mimi's eyes had drifted closed again as the warm tea lulled her further into a sea of tranquility. She heard the doors of his car closing twice but thought nothing of it. Perhaps what he went to get was in the backseat.

"Honey, I'm home." - Jason joked. Mimi didn't need to have her eyes open to know that both Jason and Samara were smiling.

"What took you so long?" - Samara asked as Jason moved closer to her.

"My 'package'..." - he made air quotes around the word. "...was late."

"Ah, but at least it arrived in one piece." - Samara countered with a grin.

Falling asleep, Mimi ignored their conversation. When a large form stood in front of her and blocked her sunlight, Mimi didn't even bother to open her eyes. "Move, Jason, you're blocking my sun."

"Hi, Babe." - said the form in front of her said. It wasn't Jason's voice either. Opening her eyes slowly, the voice still ringing in her ear, she saw the form that was blocking her sun and Jason's 'package' was staring down at her.

Her voice, even in her own ears, seemed dreamy. This had to be a dream. He could not be standing there. Or worse yet, this was a nightmare sent to torture her again. Either way, it was cruel and she was unprepared to handle it. "Shawn."


	9. Part 6b, Only Love:

Part VI - Only Love:

Part B:

Tension hung in the air like a thick cloud. Unspoken words traveled between two people who knew each other to their cores with just a look. Fears rose to the surface. Relief fell in place. The hardest part was yet to come.

"Um, Sama..." - began Jason softly, his green eyes darting between Mimi and Shawn. "...don't we have to you...you know...do the thing?" - Samara's eyebrow hitched in amusement. Was that possibly the best he could do?

"Yes, we have to go speak with my mother about why you haven't given her grandchildren yet." - she smiled easily to her husband when he glared at her. "She's been very eager to hear your answer." - Jason continued to glare at the love of his life, even as she squeezed Mimi's shoulder reassuringly. He would rather stay and watch Mimi and Shawn, intruding on a very private moment, than go and talk to his mother-in-law about why he and Samara have not had a child yet. The woman was worse than a CIA interrogator.

"Yeah." - he drew the word out slowly. Reluctantly taking Samara's hand and turning around. "We'll see you guys later." - he told Mimi and Shawn, who were still trapped in the moment. "Shawn, great to see you, man. Even under the circumstances." - Jason noticed Shawn nod as he and Samara headed towards the main house.

Words caught on the tip of Mimi's tongue. She had no idea what to say. For the first time in her life, she was utterly speechless. Her eyes washed over Shawn and she realized then just how much she missed him. Not only being with him, but seeing him. He looked tired. His chocolate orbs had taken a dark tint which she recognized as lack of sleep. His unruly mass of hair curled wildly above the tips of his ears. She watched his chest rise and fall with the intake of air; her mind reverted immediately back to the moments where her head would be laying on his chest, rising and falling in sync with it. Her eyes traveled further down to the shorts he wore and the way they showed off those muscular legs of his.

Bringing her eyes back up to his handsome face, his smooth freshly shaven skin, the heat in his eyes, and those pink lips curling at the ends into that staggeringly sexy smile of his, her heart began to pound for a different reason.

What she couldn't figure out was the way he was looking at her. Did he hate her? Love her? Want her? What? There was a gleam in his chocolate orbs that she couldn't place. Though it frightened her, it also made her beat wildly in her chest.

"How did you find me?" - the words finally escaped from her lips. Though she had plenty more to say, that seemed like the safest place to start.

Until he heard her speak again, Shawn had no idea just how much he missed Mimi's voice. Standing before her, drinking in the sight of her for the first time in a little over two days, Shawn realized that he would follow he to the depths of hell if he had to. She looked unspeakably beautiful standing there in her dark green sundress; blowing in the wind, it accentuated every soft curve of her body. Her long hair was pulled back into a ponytail. Her face was make-up free; and though her soulful orbs held fear in them, they sparkled with relief and joy as they looked longingly into his. She looked so at ease, at peace now that the weight of Claire's paternity had been lifted. For that, more than anything, Shawn was grateful.

He saw her mouth twitch at the ends nervously and realized he hadn't answered her question. "You're my soulmate." - he began softly. "I'd find you anywhere." - Mimi dropped her head and smiled, unsure of whether she should find happiness in the moment. Shawn breathed a little easier when he saw her smiling. They still had a million things to work through, but as long as she smiled at him the way she had, he was more than willing to do it. He loved her and was resolved to make her see that...no matter what it took.

Raising her eyes back to meet his, Mimi was more than a little surprised to see the gleam in his eyes had turned playful. "Seriously, how did you find me?"

"You bought your plane ticket with your credit card." - Shawn answered. "That's the first thing cops trace for a missing person."

Biting her bottom lip, Mimi felt embarrassed. "I wasn't a missing person. I told you I was leaving."

"Yeah, I know." - Shawn replied. "But my dad's colleagues didn't."

"You asked your dad to find me?" - Shawn nodded. "Why?"

Stepping closer to her, "Because you're my wife." - Shawn wrapped his arms around Mimi's waist and felt every nerve in both their bodies spark. Mimi was glad he held her closely, she would have melted to the ground had his body not been pressed to hers. Dipping his head slowly, Shawn let his lips hover just above hers. Her scent was just as intoxicating as the rest of her. He's been miserable these past two days without her. The nights without her in his arms were unbearable, but all would be right soon. "And because I love you. I'm not going to let you give up on our marriage." - the determination in his eyes did nothing to mask the heat that was already there.

Unable to bear it any longer, driven crazy by her tiny fingers flexing on his chest, Shawn kissed her.

Mimi's lips fused to her husband's in a hot-blooded kiss that ignited a fire deep within her. A fire she knew she would never be able to quell. Even as a child, Shawn-Douglas Brady affected her like no one else. She could remember being a child, hell, even a teenager and just hoping that he looked her way. Just a soft gaze from those brown eyes, an easy smile across the pink lips and she would forget her own name.

She didn't need to forget that right now. There was a reason she was here. A reason she wanted him to follow her. Though his actions spoke louder than any word he could ever say, she needed to hear the words as well. And she wouldn't be able to hear the words she so desperately needed to hear until they got other issues out of the way.

Besides, she felt guilty.

It didn't seem right that she destroyed his life, ran away, and ended up being kissed by him. No matter how much she was enjoying the kiss.

Her fingers gripped his shoulder tightly and pushed him away. "No, Shawn." - her words came out as whispers on ragged breaths. Disentangling herself from her husband's grip, Mimi forced herself to stare into his eyes. To not get caught up in the motions of his heaving chest. In the wild desire coursing through her system to connect with him again. She needed to get the words out, choke them out if need be. "It can't be this easy." - she told him. "It shouldn't be this easy." - her eyes screamed of pain far too near to speak of. "I betrayed you, Shawn. I betrayed your trust and your love. I lied to you about Claire being your daughter. You should be angry with me..." - her eyes clouded with salty tears even as her voice began to shake. "...should hate me. I hate me."

More than anything, Shawn hated knowing that she hated herself. She was such an incredible person who deserved the best in life. Her fierce spirit, one of the many things he loved about her, seemed shattered now and that was not acceptable. "You know the first thing that ran through my mind when I read your letter?" - Shawn posed softly. "How could she not stay to work it out?" - his own voice became shaky.

Taking his silence as a cue to answer. "I had my reasons at the time; all of which seem stupid now, but..." - she paused, unsure of what to say. "I didn't know what else to do." - she answered after consideration. She walked to the steps and sat down. "I figured you would hate me and go to Belle. That you guys..." - she couldn't bring herself to finish the statement.

"You thought I would leave you for Belle." - Shawn finished for her. He didn't need to see her nod to know that was the truth. He heaved a heavy sigh as he sat on the steps next to her. He noticed her how she had trouble looking at him, so he didn't press the issue. "When the initial shock wore off, I was angry. At you and at Belle. But...then I went numb."

Mimi did look at him this time. "Why?"

"I had absolutely no idea what to do. I wasn't sure of how I was feeling. I didn't know if I was angry, sad, hurt, confused." - he shook his head. "You weren't there to get angry at or to hold me as I cried. I know that sound selfish but, since we've been married, I've never had to deal with anything on my own. We've handled it together...as a united front and when you left...you took that with you. I cried for hours after I confronted Belle and Philip. Just...sat down and cried."

"I'm sorry." - Mimi whispered, tears of her own falling down her red cheeks.

Shawn smiled sadly to her. "I know." - he said. "And after I cried, I read your letter again. Then I cried more. You were so heartbroken. I could read it in your words. I could just picture you crying; torn up inside about hurting me."

"I was." - Mimi admitted. "I never want to hurt you."

"And after talking to my parents and Philip again, I read your letter one last time and it finally dawned on my why you left." - they shared a look, but Mimi remained quiet. "You had no faith in my love for you." - a tear slipped down his cheek. "And that hurt more than anything because I know that it was entirely my fault."

"No, Shawn." - Mimi tried to think of a way to tell him he was wrong, but nothing came. Truth was, he was right.

"No, Babe." - Shawn stopped her protest before it began. "Let me say this." - she owed him that much. "When we got married, I lied to you, too." - he saw her brows draw together in confusion. "I loved you. There was no doubt in my mind that I loved you and would always love you. That I could go through this life happily as your husband, but...I wasn't truly over Belle. Or over losing her to Philip." - He watched her head fall dejectedly and shot off the steps and knelt in front of her. Cupping her chin in his hand, he forced her to look in his eyes. "Reading your letter over and over again, I gained some clarity. You thought that you were my second choice. A life with you would have to do for not being able to have one with Belle. My love for you would never amount to that which I had for Belle. You left to give me the chance to finally make up my mind. And I have." - his thumbs gently wiped away the tears falling from her eyes. "I want you. You're not my first, second or third choice, but my only choice. There is no one else in this world for me, but you. You look at me and you see the man that I've always wanted to be and what's more...you bring out the man I've always wanted to be."

"But I lied to you." - Mimi said. "I hurt you so badly."

"And I forgive you." - He told her. "You did lie to me, but you finally told me the truth. You thought enough of me to tell me the truth. Nobody else who knew did. If you can forgive me going into our marriage with unresolved feelings, for allowing Belle to drive a wedge between us, and learn to trust me again, we can save our marriage, because...I already forgive you."

All she wanted to do then was jump into his arms, hold him and kiss him and never let him go. But the nagging part of her told her that it shouldn't be this easy. Shawn may have forgive her, but she had yet to forgive herself. "It shouldn't be this easy." - she said softly.

"Why not, Babe?" - Shawn questioned. "Why shouldn't we resolved to love each other, to trust each other again and to work through out problems?"

"Because..." - she began to say but honestly couldn't think of a reason. "Because I'm afraid you'll look at me one day and regret deciding to work it out. You'll see Claire with Belle and the family you wanted and you'll resent me." - her voice was desperate. "I couldn't handle that, Shawn. I wouldn't be able to take that." - her eyes slammed shut, almost as if the resentment came to his eyes that instant.

"Miriam, look at me." - he commanded softly. Her eyelids fluttered open slowly and Shawn caressed her face lightly. "The only thing I see when I look at you is love. I see the woman I love. My partner in life, my companion, my confidant, my best friend. These past two days without you have been unbearable. Don't you know by now that my home is in your arms?"

A watery smile came to her lips. Leaning forward, Mimi did the only thing she cold think to do, to conduct the action that would convey more than any word could ever say. She wrapped her arms around his neck and held him tightly. "I love you, Shawn." - she whispered against the shell of his ear. "I'm so sorry."

"Shh, Babe." - Shawn soothed her. "Me, too." - he pulled back just enough to stare into her eyes. He searched them quickly, pleased beyond belief when he say the fear fading away. He kissed her lips softly, but it was more than a kiss...it was a promise.

"What are we going to do about Claire?" - Mimi asked timidly. Sure, she could have brought it up at another time, a time when they had finally settled back in together but the words shot out of her.

"I don't know yet." - Shawn answered truthfully. "But I do want us to be a part of her life. We'll handle it together." - he smiled as he caressed her face again. "But right now..." - he pulled something from his pocket. "I want to put this back on your finger." - he held up her wedding band. "And this time...I never want you to take it off again." - Mimi smiled, she missed having the symbol of his love around her finger. Shawn took her hand and kissed it. "Babe, I love you. More than words can ever truly express. I offer this ring as a token of my love and fidelity and with the promise that now, as you wear it on your finger, there will be no secrets between us. No lies or anything else between us. Nothing...but love. Only love." - he smiled up at her. "Will you marry me...again?"

Was this her life? Mimi was sure she was going to wake up any moment now and be back in Salem with all the lies and secrets between them again. This incredible man could not possibly be kneeling in front of her and asking for her hand in marriage again after everything...but he was. He was there, loving her more than she ever thought she deserved and she loved him right back more than she ever thought she could love someone else. This was her life...and she wouldn't trade it for the world.

Smiling at him, bright as the noon sun in the sky, "Yes, Shawn, I will marry you...again."


	10. Part 7a, Forever:

Part VII - Forever:

Part A:

'_I want you to know that I don't hate you, Mom. I'm not even angry with you anymore. I just...I know you're reading this and shaking your head. I know you're upset with me for not being 'strong' enough to keep my mouth shut about Claire, but the truth is, Mom, telling him took more strength than I ever knew I had. Real strength is being terrified beyond belief and doing what you know is the right thing, Mom. It's not keeping quiet. And if I end up alone after today...that's okay. I'd rather be alone for the right reasons than with someone for the wrong ones._

_I love you, Mom. I hope one day, when we see each other again, that you'll look at me and be proud of the decisions I made._

_- Miriam'_

Shawn brushed Mimi's hair behind her ear as he stared at her sleeping face. The warm breeze blew through the open window and across their naked bodies covered only by the thin sheet. A sleepy smile curled her flushed pink lips and Shawn knew there was no moment more perfect than this. She had just fallen asleep in his arms after they surrendered themselves to each other. Her breathing had slowed down to a soft purr and the tiny hand that had been drawing circles on his chest had stilled. Craning his head to stare into her face, he smiled. The stiff neck he would suffer later would be very much worth it. They would renew their vows today. Becoming man and wife again; this time, forever. No secrets between them now. No hurt, lies or pain.

Though most wouldn't believe him, Shawn was grateful for all they went through. If they hadn't gone through all of the hurt and pain, they never would have been delivered to this special moment in time.

Pressing his warm lips to her forehead, he knew this was where he belonged.

"_Shawn, please, let's talk about this. Let's talk about our daughter." _

Belle's voice echoed in the dark. Closing his eyes, the warm breeze engulfed him while Mimi's breath lulled him into serenity.

He could see her face behind his closed lids clearly. The pain the echoed deep within her blue eyes would have affected him once upon a time, but not now. He had finally seen Belle for who she was. Seen her for the manipulator he never would have guessed she could be.

_Tears streamed down Belle's reddened cheeks. She stood face to face with Shawn in his apartment, and for the second time in two days, was met with more coldness in his chocolate orbs than ever before. Adjusting Claire on her hip, watching the way his eyes softened upon looking at their daughter's face, her heart pounded rapidly in her chest._

_Waking up this morning, the dread from her system gone, Belle intended to make Shawn see the light. To remind him that this was the dream they shared since they were children. They were soul-mates and this was the way it was meant to be. Philip hadn't come home last night; not that she really expected him to. She would always feel guilty about hurting Philip the way she had. He really didn't deserve it. Part of her would always feel guilty about hurting Mimi...she wasn't as heartless as Mimi claimed her to be. But Shawn was her destiny. She would make no apologies for loving him. Make none for wanting him._

"_Look, I know you're still mad. You have every right to be, but, Shawn..." - she allowed a watery smile to cross her lips. "...this is what we always wanted. This..." - she held Claire closer to her chest. "Look at her." - she told him, the unjustifiable pain in her voice ringing clearly. "Look at what we created. How can you be mad about making this beautiful creature?"_

_Shawn stared at her in disbelief._ _If she truly thought that was what he was angry about, she didn't know him as well as she claimed. "I'm not angry about being Claire's father. I never could be. She's beautiful and she's innocent and she's the best parts of you and I rolled into one. I'll never be unhappy about her being brought into this world" - he noticed Belle smile happily. "But..." - her smile faltered. "...the worst parts of you and I created her. The parts of us that were so selfish and greedy about wanting what we wanted...what we thought we deserved created her. The parts that thought it was okay for you to cheat on Philip and then to lie to him about it."_

"_We loved each other. We needed each other and succumbed to what had always been between us. What would always be between us." - she reached out to touch his face but he stopped her._

"_That doesn't make it okay, Belle." - he told her; seems they've had this conversation before. "Love isn't supposed to hurt people and that's exactly what we've done. You, me, Mimi, Philip. We've hurt everyone we've claimed to care about...and even Claire. We've deprived our daughter of the family she should have had all along."_

"_We can give her that now. Mimi's gone, Philip's gone, we can be together." - she pleaded. "We can give Claire everything she deserves."_

"_No, we can't." - he was adamant about that fact. The determination is his eyes, the subtle shake of his head. They both placed an obscene amount of fear in Belle's heart._

"_Why not?" - she whispered. "What's stopping us?"_

"_My heart." - he told her. "It doesn't belong to you anymore." - he chuckled softly. "I can't believe it took me this long to figure it out, and if Mimi hadn't left, I never would have even noticed but...I don't love you anymore, Belle. Not that way." - the tears Belle cried echoed her vast heartbreak. "I love my wife." - he declared. "And I'm going to get her back. I'll deal with everything else after that."_

"Say, handsome," - Shawn's eyes opened quickly, shifted and locked with Mimi's. A sleepy smile still across her lips. "All your loud thinking is keeping me awake." - she joked.

"Oh?" - Shawn hitched an eyebrow sleepily and Mimi thought it was the cutest thing she had ever seen. "And how is that? You were snoring, loudly, just a few minutes ago. And my eyes were closed, how do you know that you didn't just wake me up?"

"First," - she slapped his shoulder lightly. "I don't snore. Second, I know when you're sleeping and I know when you're not. You clearly were not as evidenced by your normal breathing and the fact that as soon as you heard me speaking, your eyes shot open and locked with mine. I love you, Babe, but you sleep like the dead. A herd of elephants stampeding in our bedroom wouldn't disturb you."

"Maybe." - he shifted to his side, still keeping her locked in his arms. His hands immediately sought out the most sensitive parts of her back. Her skin felt like silk against his fingers. "But those elephants aren't nearly as sexy as my wife. Nor is the noise they make as sexy as your voice." - he dipped his head and brushed his lips over hers lightly, feeling a tingle shooting through him as he fingers caressed his back.

"Thank you for the compliment. You're pretty sexy yourself." - she kissed him again. "What are you thinking about?"

"Nothing." - he smiled easily. "Just how we got here."

An alarm sounded in Mimi's mind. "Where were you?"

"Nowhere nearly as wonderful as here." - he told her, taking note of the worry in her voice. Kissing her again, he waited until he felt her relax before stopping. "Don't worry. I'm not running."

"Oh, I'm not worried." - she declared. "It took this long, wonderful week of us being down here for me to stop being worried, but...I know you love me. I know you choose me. And if you run out on our wedding, I'll kill you." - she joked with a sleepy grin.

"As will Jason and Samara." - Shawn added.

"Not to mention everyone they're flying down for the wedding."

"And then, I'd kill myself." - Shawn finished. Brushing her hair behind her ear, Shawn was pleased to see the amusement in her eyes. It had taken them so long to get to this point, but he wouldn't trade it for the world. "I love you." - he told her, suddenly serious.

Cupping his face in her hands, "Shawn, I was only kidding. I know you'd never leave me. You promised me you wouldn't once before. I was only teasing."

Smiling, "I know, Babe."

More concerned now. "What's wrong then?" - she asked.

"Nothing. I just never want to forget, and never want you to forget, all that we went through to get to this moment."

"We won't, Shawn." - she told him. "We're going to be okay." - silence fell for a beat. "The only moment I'm worried about now is getting down that aisle tomorrow. That and that I look fabulous in my dress...that's just imperative." - she grinned.

"And what about saying 'I do'?" - he questioned jokingly. "Is that imperative as well? Or did that not make your list of priorities?"

Rolling her eyes, "Of course it did." - she shifted in his arms so that her back was to his chest. "It's just not as important as me looking fabulous in my dress. I'm going to say 'I do' regardless, the dress makes an impression. And seeing as how you're going to rip it off the first chance you get, it has to be a good impression."

Smiling against her neck, "You know me so well." - he confirmed his intent to get her out of the dress. His strong hands began to rove the exposed front of her body. "You're not wearing any clothes now." - he whispered against the shell of her ear. Mimi's hands instinctively rose above her head and entwined in his hair in a reverse embrace. They needed to get to sleep. Their wedding was in a few short hours, but with her husband's body pressed to hers, his hands roaming, his fingers teasing, the fire roared within and she knew it would never quell.

Shifting so that his body was on top of hers, Mimi stared into Shawn's eyes and smiled.

So the wedding would start a little bit late...they'd be married by the end of it.


	11. Part 7b, Forever:

**Author's Notes:** I should have been through with this a month ago. I had actually written this chapter a month ago and just couldn't stand it. It seemed so formal, so...blech. This fic was about not having the answers to everything, that sometimes you just have to find your way in life on your own terms and I think this rewrite depicts that.

I can't believe this is over. There might be a sequel, there might not be. I'm in a _Smallville_ obsession right now and my _Days_ fics have taken a backseat. We'll see what happens in the coming weeks of my vacation time.

I hope you enjoy this. I hope it comes across the way I want it to. Thanks for taking this journey with me.

Part VII - Forever:  
Part B:

"Love, much like life, can be unexpected, unpredictable, and unavoidable. That's the kind of love the two of you share. A love that's unexpected but cherished, unpredictable yet the foundation of your lives, and unavoidable in the sense that it grips you and won't let go. You guys are special, your love is special, and I don't ever want you to let it go. Don't ever let it go."

Jason, the best man, raised his glass toward the bride and groom, and then shifted to the crowd gathered in the large dining area on his in-law's island estate. "I love you guys." - he told them with happy tears in his deep green eyes. "To the bride and groom!"

"To the bride and groom!" - the crowd responded, lively, and Mimi and Shawn kissed.

Sitting together at the large table comprised of their family and friends, Mimi and Shawn felt the day could have gotten any better. Their wedding had gone off smoothly. Just them, their parents, Jason and Samara, with Philip and Claire joined them underneath a waterfall as they pledged their eternal love to one another again. They'd invited Belle, saying that it was time to put the past in the past. That they all needed to move on and accept the future and whatever it held, but she'd declined the offer. Philip assured them both that he and Claire would be there. And with his daughter in his arms, the woman he loved in front of him, and his best friends beside him, Shawn remarried the woman of his dreams.

It was the perfect ending to the week they'd spent finding their way back to each other. Finding their way through the dark forest of lies and deceit to the place where they could finally be happy.

It was the perfect beginning for a life together.

Keeping in the 'untraditional' theme of the day, their reception was more like a 'roast' than a formal party. Many of their friends who had flown down regaled the crowd with stories of Mimi and Shawn from high school and how they weren't surprised that this is where they ended up.

"Together." - Chloe Black had flown down from London; more than a little shocked to receive Jason's call, but eager to see the nuptials having missed them the first time. "You guys belong together. I remember in high school - when Mimi and I couldn't stand each other…" - she pointed out to the crowd with a smile. "That the two of you…you had some weird connection. Shawn, you understood Mimi when _no one _else could. And she got through to you in a way no one else did. It wasn't glamorous, it wasn't showy, and it wasn't anything anyone would think to look at twice…but it was real and it was deep. That's the best kind of love." - she raised her glass. "I love you both very much. I wish you all the happiness in the world, no one deserves it more."

The crowd cheered and toasted along with Chloe. 'I love you', Mimi mouthed to Chloe as Shawn blew her a kiss.

Samara was the next to stand and she looked down at her two newfound friends with a bright smile. "I guess since I'm the matron of honor, I should say something. I haven't known you both very long, just a little over a week, but I feel like I've known you all my life through Jason." - she tossed a smile at her husband, tears glistening in her eyes. "You two have the most impeccable spirits. Through adversity, through hardships, through the blackest night the two of you fight to survive. You keep faith in something greater than yourselves. You love each other in ways that many people don't. Completely, unabashedly, and unconditionally. I am so proud to know the two of you." - she smiled after raising her glass to them and the crowd.

"I, uh," - Philip was saying as he stood. "I have something to say. I know most of you here already know what's going on in our family. So, you know…" - he looked over at Mimi and Shawn and smiled. "The two of you are the greatest friends I've ever had. We've not always seen eye to eye, we probably never will, but…through everything...the two of you have been a constant in my life." - tears streaked down his face as he looked at Claire in Hope's arms. "No matter where life takes us, I want you to know how grateful I am to have you both in my life. Shawn, you always challenge me and you never let me forget that just because I'm Victor Kiriakis' son doesn't make me a king." - he paused, remembering what a cocky kid he was and how he and Shawn clashed. "If it weren't for you, man, I would have never grown up. Mimi, you are the strongest person I know. You have a strength that is so deep and your faith in people…is remarkable. _You are remarkable_. I'm so happy that the two of you found each other."

Philip walked and kissed Mimi's cheek before hugging Shawn tightly, whispering words in his nephew's ear that no one else could hear. They had come so far and Mimi couldn't suppress the tears of joy that sprung to her eyes at the sight of them.

"I guess since I'm standing," - Shawn began. "I should make a toast to my beautiful wife." - he beamed down at her, tears in his eyes as her lovely face transformed to that of yesteryear. "I'm not going to say anything she hasn't already heard before, or that any of you haven't heard before. I love you. I love everything about you. You complete me.' - he told her with tears falling down his cheeks. "That's not deep or profound or anything but the truth." - the words he couldn't say, about what they'd been through, about Claire, about the future, she could see clearly in his eyes.

Mimi stood with him, tears in her eyes but a wide smile on her face. Cupping his face in her hands, she tried to convey all the love she felt for him. Words of the past and future need not be spoken when only this moment mattered. This one moment where they stood before each other as husband and wife with total love and complete honesty between them.

Everything else would come later.

And ever if it didn't, and they had more hard times to get through, they would always have this moment...to light their way.

"I love you." - Mimi said and then kissed him.

- The End -


End file.
